Thursday, February 05, 2009

Yet Another Reason Social Networking Technology is... gay

It happened again...

Fears of impostors increase on Facebook

I'm not a fan of social networking. Never have. Never will be. To me, social networking is nothing more than a self-dwindling, sick, unrealistic sense of friendship, popularity and most importantly: a false impression of listening ears of people who give a shit.

There's plenty of excuses why people use social networking. Any worthy excuse I've ever heard usually boils down to "keeping in touch". Stupid reason, at best. If you want to keep in touch with your friends, try 'human contact'. Any one I know who I've befriended has my personal home telephone number. I don't see how you can get more personal than that considering everyone on the planet in any urban-type area has a cell phone.

Perhaps I'm old school or I just don't want to adopt douche-bag adaptations of so-called "great technology", but what happened to e-mail? *Everyone* has it. There's no way you can't have e-mail and even register for any social networking service. Last time I checked, e-mail attachments still worked and most of the working, urban world uses some sort of broadband connection, whether is be wired or wireless, or at home or know where to get access to it. To me, social network sites have pretty much reinvented the already turning wheel that message boards, newsgroups, e-mail distributions and instant messaging clients already have done for MANY years.

I, myself, prefer my privacy, seclusion and "me" time. I don't give a shit about your twitter notification telling me where you are every 5 seconds of the day. Nor do I care if I hurt your feelings if I didn't "shout out" to you on your MySpace message board. I could care less what your likes and dislikes are; your favorite movies; the music you like; what damn high school you came from; why you can't relate to mommy and daddy anymore; what your sexual orientation is; why you choose the religion you do. To me, it's all a sick cry for attention, bragging rights and to get some face time on the internet.

Insecurity makes you embrace social networking. If you had *real* friends, they'd already know the answers to all the intricate questions I mentioned above or that MySpace asks you in your profile. You wouldn't have to leave yourself bleeding in the wind for the whole world to see.

On top of all this, think of all the depressed, confused and spastic people who spend hour after countless hour typing, posting, uploading photos, and keeping their profile up-to-date in hopes that they'll get one "virtual" nibble of friendship. Yes, virtual. Not *real*. I swear that social networking is in a close damn second with NCAA tournament in amount of time wasted. Take all that lost effort and put it into real, tangible friendships instead of a thumbnail photo and a lame profile I wouldn't trust any farther than I could throw it.

In conclusion, on a internet social networking medium, my condolences. I think it's the worst technology this century has created.

3 comments:

doschman said...

OMFG! There is some gosh damn wisdom on earth: http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1877187,00.html?cnn=yes

THANK YOU TIME MAGAZINE!

Zeon said...

Is social networking really a technology though? That's a bit like calling PB&J a 'culinary style'.

You should really join FriendFace :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYZIMoSmbSc

doschman said...

Sure it is, Z. Technology doesn't necessarily have to be tangible or Microsoft would be out of a business (and how I wish they were).

For your FriendFace remark, sleep with your Care Bear night light on. Bet on it that I'll be sneaking into your house and suffocating you with PB&J on Texas toast (because its SO much more dense than Sara Lee Honey Wheat)... curse you.